Stepping into this week giving the actual least amount of fucks possible. How freeing.
Listen, I gotta tell you something right now. If you’re trying to get someone to like you — someone who clearly doesn’t — just stop. Let that shit go. You’re better than that.
Imagine yourself as a child, how innocent you were, how you just wanted to be loved and seen. Would you want to put that lil guy through the trauma of trying to play with a bully who kept pushing him down? Nope.
I’ve got some news for you: hurt people hurt people. It’s not your job to find out why they’re potentially part of the walking wounded. Keep it moving, bro.
When 90% of your world responds to you with simple kindness and respect, why bother with the other 10% who wanna make you feel less than? Release them in whatever way is possible for your specific situation. And if you still have to interact them regularly, keep it cute, or put it on mute.
Their may be layers of self-hate and pain there. Or not. Again, not your job to discover the “why,” you just need to love yourself through the process of accepting the situation exactly as it is. Which may be very uncomfortable. But sometimes as adults, we have to accept uncomfortable situations, and just get through them.
If you’re used to people responding to you in a certain way, I know it can be hard when someone varies in a negative way. What part of your own ego can you let go of? How can you practice self respect? And when the urge to people-please rears it’s ugly head, please take a deep breath and be okay with an awkward silence or two.
It’s not your job to make mean people feel uncomfortable.
Life is up and down. Life is messy. Life isn’t linear. We’re not living in our parent’s age anymore, so let’s release our parents’ scripts.
What this world needs more of is self compassion. Yes, we’re all fighting to be seen, heard, and loved. Yes, many of us feel tired. Yes, the energy today is highly volatile and unlike any energy our human form has experienced.
How can we relax into this here and now without steamrolling ourselves? Can we treat ourselves with the gentleness, love, playfulness, and respect we would for an innocent child?
Yes, the critical inner voice will always be there – that’s not going away. But you gotta stop believing that shit. Watch the negative messages come by like a passing cloud. Feel them for only as long as you need to, to become aware that the script was switched — it’s all mixed up — cause those nasty messages aren’t for you, you beautiful ball of humanness. Release the harshness toward yourself. Release the judgement. Because no one’s ever gonna judge you as harshly as you judge yourself.
Hang in there, people. If you feel like you’re fighting, pushing, striving, and forcing, take a breather. Take a fucking bubble bath. Know that you’re doing enough. Know that you are enough. You are enough.
Check me out in the Descente FW ’18 campaign. I must say I feel pretty great: from being the pudgy kid in elementary school to booking multiple campaigns this year as a fitness model.
Oh, the places we can go when we’re determined and never, ever — under any circumstances — give up.
I’ve spent half of my life on the journey to become a professional model. You’ll never know how much I’ve sacrificed for this.
All the “no’s,” the “huge opportunities” that turned out to be nothing, giving up addictions, the constant struggle to convince myself I actually care about my “day job,” the dumbfoundedness I regularly feel as to why I’ve continued on this path for so long…
And then in an instant, without warning, it manifests. Slow for years, and then fast and all at once. And it hasn’t even [really] begun yet.
It feels fucking amazing. My best words of wisdom for anyone pushing to achieve their dreams are: start today, get a mentor, take the next right action (which sometimes is no action, btw), and think about it as a day-at-a-time process.
In a society that glorifies “hustle” and “hard work,” how can we work smarter and not harder? When everything inside us wants us to “push through,” how can we pause, recalibrate, and move forward with sniper-like precision?
This is my journey.
This is my commitment to myself.
This is my passion.
This is my life.
In the last few months, I’ve been blessed to have some pretty epic bookings: a 4-page Men’s Grooming Editorial in GQ Magazine — which featured a whole-page, full-face shot on pg. 20 of the June 2018 Comedy Issue — and campaigns for Descente, Asics, Lululemon and Kenneth Cole. You won’t see my face in all of them, though, as the majority of my modeling work is as a Parts Model.
In any case, you’re only seeing the tip of the iceberg of hard work I’ve put in for almost half of my lifetime (I began my Modeling Journey at 16 and am now 30).
A lot of people ask me the same question: “How do I become a model?” or “What advice do you have for getting into modeling?”
My first answer is almost always the same, which is “don’t get into it for the money.” Making money as a model sounds great, but there’s a lotttt of behind-the-scenes work that goes into a successful — or moderately successful (or even minimally successful, for that matter) — modeling career. Let’s dive in with my 5 Simple Tips to Start Working as a Model Today:
- Determine your Market.
Modeling isn’t all 6-foot + fashion Glamazons. There are other thriving markets, too, like Parts Modeling, Fit and Showroom Modeling, Lifestyle and Commercial Modeling, Fitness Modeling, Promotional Modeling, etc. Research some of these terms to find where you fit, so you can save yourself time and potential heartache by starting in the right sect of the industry. Also, determine if your main goal is to achieve recognizable exposure, or make money as a model, because they don’t always go hand-in-hand.
- Create a Model Mayhem profile.
Model Mayhem is where I began building my professional modeling portfolio when I was 18. You can create a profile, upload images, connect with photographers, and even book small jobs to acquire those golden tear sheets.
- Take some Polaroids.
If you are totally new to modeling and have never done a professional photo shoot before, take some simple Polaroids like the ones below to market yourself to photographers, agents, and potential clients. Another option is to simply pay a photographer, whose work you like, to do a professional photo shoot, but in my experience, I know that can be a pretty big financial commitment for beginning models. Use these photos below from professional model comp cards to guide you:
- Set up a Photoshoot with a Local Photographer.
Like I mentioned above, you can either pay a photographer of your choosing, or set up a Time for Print (TFP) shoot, which is an exchange shoot for portfolio images, which benefit both you and the photographer in getting future work. Model Mayhem is a great resource for that.
- Contact a Local Modeling Agency and see if you can come in for an Open Call.
Local Modeling Agencies can help you get paying work as a model. If they don’t like your look, however, don’t be discouraged, because the majority of working models today have heard tons of “no’s” to get to a “yes.”
“Every model has a different story. Some traveled the world and worked tons in their teen years, plateaued in their mid-20s, then started working up a storm again in their 30s. Others didn’t get big jobs until they were 45. And others hit it big as a child model and kept on going until they were 20, then moved out of the industry. Everyone’s career will look different, but you’ll never know unless you get started today with one small step today.”
Photo by Ira Veridiano